Putting on a pair of jeans "ew no way" *on the floor it goes* what about this skirt "ugh not with these fat legs" *on the floor* maybe these pants "i guess they will do but god i hate my butt"
Now it's time to pick a shirt.... this one? "no! you can see the fat in my arms" *on the floor* oh I love this shirt! "damn it its to small now, it shrunk." *thrown across the room* Lets try the one "its long so it covers my fat lower stomach and it covers my flabby butt, my arms could look better but it works i guess"
Do you EVER go through this? I have to honestly say, I go through this every day. Even when I feel like I have found the outfit for the day, I might change 1/2 way through because I felt great in it until I got in public. "Is my shirt rising?" **Pulls down on the shirt** I dont want people too see my lower stomach.
POOR BODY IMAGE, something most woman, teenagers, even young girls have. I see many people do what I do to check-in with how we look. EVERY SINGLE MIRROR, WINDOW REFLECTION I'll look in, not because I'm conceded.. but because I'm making sure I look okay. "can you see my lower stomach?" "are my legs looking as fat as I feel they are?" "hows my hair?" "my makeup OK?" I'm sorry but I DO care what people think about me.
How am I dealing with this? I keep a journal. Every time I catch myself looking a mirror and a reflection I write down and keep track on **what was a I feeling when I did that?** **How did I feel afterwards?**
So far I see that I "check-in" on average 90 times A DAY! geez. I will take this in to my doctor and we are working on it. I will write more about it when I know more... So far I can tell you keep a log/journal about it.